Buddy Dies, Willie Aames Named New Clinton Dog

Bill Clinton announced that Willie Aames, who played "Buddy" on the hit show "Charles in Charge," will replace Buddy the Dog -- recently killed in an auto accident -- as the family pet. The former president admitted Aames will have a hard time "filling the dog's shoes, and when I mean shoes, I mean it figuratively, because dogs don't wear shoes, or when they do, it's pretty stupid" but felt that Aames "was damn funny in the movie Zapped! where Heather Thomas from 'The Fall Guy' appears to be naked, but turns out, if you read the credits, that it was a body double. Also, since Scott Baio wasn't returning my calls..." Other replacement candidates had been Spuds McKenzie, Scooby-Doo and Chelsea.

-Eric Butterman