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Coming In A Little Short

On Tuesday, the Whitehouse acknowledged that the budget
deficit was ballooning out of control. It has now reached
$455 billion and climbing. However they were quick to point
out that:
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Budget projections for 2004 are based
on information obtained from British intelligence,
so it’s all likely horseshit anyway. |
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The shortfall should be partially covered by the
sale of that extra enriched uranium stockpile to
some guy in Saudi Arabia. |
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The Department of Defense gift shop has reported
that total sales of the 55 most wanted Iraqis playing
cards have brought in anywhere from $15 to $20.
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We just invaded Iraq. Iraq has a shit load of
oil. Oil costs something like $20 for just one barrel.
Bonus. |
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Whitehouse press secretary Ari Fleicher’s
replacement, Scott McClellan will have to start
at the bottom of the pay scale, saving the executive
branch valuable wages. |
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Remember that money we’re sending Africa
to fight aids? How much does it cost to cancel a
check? |
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The White House is seriously considering forcing
three of the nine supreme court judges into early
retirement. |
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Washington provokes North Korea. North Korea nukes
California. Washington collects the insurance money. |
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Scott McClellan is short, but people seem to like
him anyway. |
By
Travis Daub |