Don't Touch my Scotus
A conversation I had last night with a security guard
(the first 12 lines are true)

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"Sir the Supreme Court is closed."

I'd just like to take a picture of it in the snow-

"It’s closed."

But

"Sir, the whole building is closed."

But I’m not in the building. I’m outside on the sidewalk walking by.

"It’s closed sir."

The sidewalk is closed?

"The Supreme Court is closed."

What if I stand right here? Is this ok? [I take one step to the left]

"The stairs are closed. The whole thing is-"

Yeah. Closed. I got it. (I begin to walk away)

"Sir, the city is closed."

But, cities don't close.

"Sir, the city is closed."

So, what do I-

"Go home to Virginia, sir."

But I had reservations for dinner.

"Dinner is closed."

Dinner can't be closed.

The Supreme Court is closed, sir.

PLUS:
Even more Security Guard Humor:

 

Two Security Guards on Top of The White House Theater: